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Thursday, 21 August, 2008, 21:34.48
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Topic: McClown pre-match chat with Venables (Read 83 times)
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AndyT
Supporter Trusted
First Team
Karma: 106
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Posts: 824
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A REAL CONVERSATION BETWEEN TERRY VENABLES (TV) & STEVE MCLAREN (Mc) BEFORE THE CROATIA GAME
Mc - Right, Tel, thanks to Israel I can still get us through to the Euros and can't afford any mistakes. Goalkeeper - who's the best in the country?
TV - Rob Green
Mc - Don't know him. Is he in the squad?
TV - No.
Mc - Who have we got - I can't afford to play that clown Robinson again?
TV - James and Carson.
Mc - Who would you go for?
TV - Well James is in good form and has more experience.
Mc - Hmmmmm, James cost Sven a few games, I'll go with Carson. Defence picks itself; Nev, JT, Rio and Ash.
TV - They're all injured, Steve.
Mc - Oh. Well, Micah at right back, Ledley and Carra in the middle and the other fella who can only kick with one foot on the left.
TV - Ledley's injured, Steve - and Carra refuses to play for his country.
Mc - Who does that leave me?
TV - Lescott and Sol.
Mc - There must be other centre halves?
TV - They're all foreigners, Steve.
Mc - Lescott? I thought he was a left back, never mind, he's in.
Midfield is easy Becks, Lamps, Stevie G and Joey.
TV - I wouldn't start with Becks, Steve. Not fit and playing in a Mickey Mouse league.
Mc - Well I saw him a few weeks ago and he scored twice in a 12-4 win.
TV - Save him towards the end in case we need a get out of jail card like against Greece.
Mc - Good idea - so we'll play the little fella on the right. You know,quick with no end product.
TV - Lennon?
Mc - No, the other one. Hiss Dad will be in the TV studio, so that should go down well. So that's SWP, Lamps, Stevie G and Joey.
TV - Steve, you know Frank and Stevie G can't play together, even my old mum knows that.
Mc - Only because neither one is defensive. I'm going to put another man behind them, Barry. That'll fool Bilic. Now, up front. I think we should play the two that caused Russia so many problems here.
TV - Heskey and Owen?
Mc - Yep.
TV - They're both injured.
Mc - $hit - who would you play?
TV - Rooney and Ashton.
Mc - Excellent, two class players, they're in.
TV - They're both injured.
Mc - Fck me, have I upset the big man up there?
TV - Who, Barwick?
Mc - No THE big man.
TV - Crouchy won't let you down.
Mc - How many goals has he scored this season?
TV - None
Mc - None? Is he the best we've got?
TV - We've got Defoe and Bent as well. They've got one goal between them.
Mc - One goal between 3 of our best players, why is that?
TV - Too many foreigners in the Premiership.
Mc - Tel, I'm struggling here, do you think I'm out of my depth?
TV - Don't be silly, look at your CV, how many trophies have you won?
Mc - None.
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